op. ed.

schools should be run like businesses. everyone recognizes the superior efficacy of private corporations when compared with bloated, bureaucratic governmental institutions! the examples are legion--halliburton immediately springs to mind or worldcom, maybe even global crossing--and i still think the business savvy of enron is the paradigm our schools should strive to attain. (seriously, ken lay would've made an AWESOME administrator, but i digress...) just think how successful our schools would be if they were more like wal-mart or starbucks--why there'd be one on every corner! better yet, our schools' marquees could read "SONY elementary...56 billion students served," just like mcd's... and their uniforms could be stitched with corporate sponsors' names like NASCAR drivers. our curriculum would promote students being good consumers over being good citizens. this is the best way to prepare our students for their glorious futures as serfs in our corporate feudal state...